V-Rod New Years

Plagiarized from Clement Clarke Moore (Twas the Night Before Christmas)

Twas the night before New Years and in the garage,

The V-Rod was stirring, parked next to the Dodge.

Its keys were hung neatly arranged on the rack,

I’d slip in a short ride – while they nibbled on snacks.

——

This cold night for sure – it demanded full dress,

A helmet and gloves, several layers no less.

I quietly rustled around for my boots,

Slipped on my chaps, my best friend in cahoots.

—–

The door closed discretely as a TCLOCS was done,

All systems were readied it was time for some fun!

The engine turned over quite smoothly and quick,

I was off down the road with a thumbs up from Nick.

—–

Just a mile or two – was all the time that I had,

I’d look at some angels, go back home – be a gad.

But what to my wondering eyes did appear-

Lights flashing behind me, some yelling – oh, Dear!

—–

She opened the car door, and made such a clatter,

I shut down my hot V-Rod, to see what was the matter.

“You’ve ruined my party”, – all the neighbors could hear;

My arms fell around her, in regret – drew her near.

—–

“It’s the V-Rod”, I whimpered; just a little white lie,

“It makes you jump on it – and ride?”; her reply.

Overhead there was rumbling, we looked up in full fear,

Air Force One flying over, flaps halfway and with gear!

—–

Obama was waving and throwing out gifts,

“All America loves me, and my emotional lifts!”

He needed some prompting, seemed in love with himself,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself!

—–

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know that our future was dread.

We stood there in wonder as he shouted to us-

“New health care taxation, no more cars – ride the bus!

—–

My V-Rod rode angry as I made my way home,

The wife was a steamin’, when I got to the phone.

Our congressman listed intently at first-

But hinted there might be more news, yet the worst!

—–

“You see, new environment laws will demand,

all gas burning engines may be banned in our land.”

This news was disturbing but taken in stride-

Happy New Year to all – forget Barry – Let’s Ride!

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