Archive for August, 2010

The Green Motorcyclist

August 22, 2010

I recently read an article in the Wall Street Journal ( online version ) by Scott Adams [ you know, the creator of Dilbert ]. Anyway, Scott being a smart engineering type explains how difficult it is to be ‘green’ and save the earth through building ‘green’ buildings. He indicates it is hard for many reasons. Anyway, I thought about maybe it might be rather easy to be a ‘green biker’.

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Save the earth from greenhouse gases, tides and famines;

decrease consumption – gas and other carbon atoms.

Use less throttle when passing that belching tractor-trailer rig,

the weeds keep growing in my garden – everywhere! And they get big!

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But green, we must – be pushing on towards less consuming engines,

little things that huff and puff quite daintily I would confess.

Not carbon atoms they consume, no – other things that aren’t imagined.

So on we go with our commitment – doing more, consuming less.

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Smaller tires need smaller brakes, for stopping we’ll just hesitate!

Much less iron in the frame – but toughness; it’s just down the drain-

Big batteries for DC bikes, will get you there – someday soon.

For if you start at six a-m; five miles you’ll gain and that by noon!

A Motorcycle Stimulus

August 20, 2010

Almost every sector of the economy is getting a federally funded stimulus these days. Housing, autos, banks, the unemployed – everyone seems to be getting handouts except us motorcycle riders. Why doesn’t Washington recognize that motorcycle riders are hurting too – we need that free government money to stimulate motorcycle rider creativity and sense of well being. Plus we promise to accelerate the money we get back into the economy for things like more chrome, bigger engines, new tires, pizza and chocolate candy. What’s not to like?

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The v-twin sags into its slot, no fanfare bringing glee-

a little sad, depressed; it watches markets sink all day.

As others get a handout minus any handling fees,

of dollars freshly printed in D.C., the bloggers say.

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Economies, supply – demand; with charts and graphs galore.

revised, updated and drilled down; the Fed it knows the way-

All in line for balm that’s blended on Potomac’s shore-

Upgrade my motorcycle! – based on money made today!

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No wait, the data is confusing Wall Street pros repine-

The yen is climbing past the Euro; California in decline.

But I will boldly press along, my check is in the mail.

Fire up the v-twin, off we go! Into the autumn of travail-

Motorcycle Jobless Claims

August 20, 2010

Jobless claims continue to be higher than anyone likes. Washington has stimulated till the cows come home to apparently no avail. Why doesn’t everyone go out and purchase a motorcycle! That would benefit the economy in so many ways…

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News is out again today, the jobless numbers grow;

Each stimulus, they fail to gain,

employment without blame to show.

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Committing to a motorbike will answer all the wails!

Riding cool efficiencies and cutting traffic costs-

plus education profits and each license drives more sales.

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We get more cars from off the roads,

and gain new buys of clothes and chrome;

as men and women working give us all a lighter load.

The New Yorker Magazine Motorcycle Poem

August 14, 2010

Most of you probably don’t ever read The New Yorker magazine; either the print or on-line version. Neither do I – except for the cartoons and just a few of their poetry selections. Why do I mention this? I don’t know really – except New Yorker Magazine poems don’t ever seem to have a rhythm or consistent rhyme about them. They seem to be just a record of some detached, new age beatnik recording his thoughts about some hip activity like sailing around Maine looking at old lighthouses. So here is my attempt at writing a New Yorker style motorcycle poem. And since it is a New Yorker Magazine type poem – it is understood that you are far too unsophisticated for me to care about your opinion.

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Dreary days near the Hudson river as street vendors peer down into their stoves.

The horns and honks of insecurity tap out of tune of sheer drudgery;

And yet he seeks to find that sublime state of two-wheeled transportation.

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Escaping from liberal talk shows on the radio – he dashes to a dealer’s corner flat,

where clean new bikes with engines strong await some cool, aloof mind to demand hard speed;

and race the rider to a rocky shore up north [ or at least further away from New Jersey ].

In Maine let’s say where lighthouses pine for faux-caring riders.

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His tank is almost empty and the tolls have drained his stash-

But onward he goes towards the expected destination and conversations to save lighthouses.

Totally sublime and carbon neutral.

The Perfect Motorcycle

August 13, 2010

While all riders look for sublime weather, open roads and pastoral scenery; it’s better with the perfect bike. Good motorcycles are a compromise between features and price – reliability and performance. Getting a great ride can make all the difference no matter the weather or riding conditions. Here’s to a good motorcycle no matter what the emblem!

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Looks good on cloudy days with rain-

Sharp chrome reflects in sunshine bright.

The seat defines a comfort ride;

with handlebars that reach just right.

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The engine purrs – but growls when pushed!

With pipes that sound a measured roar.

Reflectors meet their mission full,

while handling is nimble; never a chore.

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The miles per gallon let me ride-

and parts perform for years of life.

Some compliments from passersby-

The price I paid brings me delight.

Riding the Great Recession

August 13, 2010

The Great Recession of 2008-2010 continues unabated. Real unemployment approaches 16%; while the Federal Government and the Federal Reserve struggle to craft unique strategies to stem the malaise. Nothing seems to work – which is par for the course for Democrats.

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Employment down, discouraged workers up;

Interest rates down, the price of gold is up-

Political mood down, wheat bushels up.

Miles ridden down, showroom count is up!

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Cruising is a stimulus that always works for most;

If gas is in the tank, ride the long way to the coast!

Melody refined as the v-twin rumbles fine…

Odometer rolls on over prairie, through the pines.

Brother can you spare a Harley V-Rod?


Bad Grammer Biker

August 2, 2010

A recent article on Yahoo! News by Kaboodle.com identified the ten most common spelling / grammar mistakes that most computer spell checking programs may not identify. See if you can find some of them in the following short motorcycle poem.

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Its fun to ride threw hill and dale,

past towns with lights and lakes with sales.

To glide on byways then highways is the best-

Effects you with an uplift affect!

I wonder past old farmers fields,

full of creations’ growth and wander;

Further I go and than a little farther.